Lied for 18 Years: Ethical or Not?

Xie Lanzhi – Ethical Leadership Through Moral Courage

She is probably the strongest ethics case study in the movie.

Ethical dilemma of Not sending Musheng's Obituary

She could have sent Musheng's wife the news that Musheng had died. She did not.

Instead she chose to continue writing letters and sending money to his wife Shurou for almost twenty years.

From a compliance perspective, many would say:

"She is lying."

Yet from an ethical leadership perspective, the question becomes much deeper.

What higher purpose is she protecting?

What Lanzhi demonstrates

1. Moral courage

Doing what is difficult even when no one knows.

She gains nothing.

In fact, she sacrifices time, money and even her own happiness.

2. Stakeholder thinking

Instead of asking

"Is this good for me?"

she asks

"Who will be hurt if I stop?"

She protects Musheng, Shurou, and both families.

Responsible leadership is about multiple stakeholders, not self-interest.

3. Long-term ethics

Most ethics failures happen because leaders optimise for today.

Lanzhi thinks in decades.

Exactly what responsible leadership requires. What are your thoughts on Lanzhi and the movie Dear You?

Brief story of Dear You:
Xiaowei, a debt-ridden young man from China's Chaoshan region, travels to Thailand hoping to find his supposedly billionaire grandfather, Zheng Musheng. Instead, he discovers that Musheng died in 1960 and was never wealthy. As he pieces together decades of hidden letters, Xiaowei learns that his grandmother, Ye Shurou, had faithfully waited in China for remittances and messages from her husband. The shocking truth emerges: for 18 years, a woman named Xie Lan Zhi secretly wrote those letters and sent money while pretending to be Musheng, preserving hope for the family through extraordinary sacrifice. Xiaowei's search for money ultimately becomes a journey of truth, love, and responsibility.

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