What's so special about Xie Lai Shun? As the father of Lan Zhi, he is drunk most of the time and never really cares about the hostel business.
That is exactly what makes Xie Laishun one of the most brilliant, subverted, and universally praised characters in the movie Dear You (给阿嬷的情书)!
While he initially appears to be a careless, alcohol-dependent slacker who leaves all the heavy lifting of the Bangkok Chinatown hostel to his daughter, he actually serves as Lan Zhi's greatest emotional anchor and safety net.
Without this drunk man, there will be no Musheng making a living in Thailand and Lan Zhi's writing of letters for 18 years.
Without this drunk man, there will be no Musheng making a living in Thailand and Lan Zhi's writing of letters for 18 years.
Viewers and critics on platforms like Douban have pointed out several reasons why his character is profoundly special:
1. A Progressive, Unconditional Fatherly Love
In an era and culture heavily weighed down by patriarchal expectations, Laishun completely breaks the mold:
- Rejecting Toxic Traditions: When an unreasonable marriage proposal is pushed upon Nanzhi, he fiercely steps in and rejects it to protect her.
- The "走仔" (Zou-Zia) Monologue: In a scene that has moved audiences to tears, he flips the traditional Teochew term for daughter, "zou-zia" (which literally implies a daughter is destined to leave the family), stating that his daughter is not someone who will just walk away.
- Ultimate Acceptance: He gives Nanzhi absolute freedom to choose her own path, subtly letting her know that no matter what she decides, he will always be there to back her up.
2. A Silent Pillar of the Migrant Community
Though he jokes around and looks chaotic, Laishun embodies the profound "brotherhood" and structural resilience of the early South Seas (Nanyang) Chinese migrants:
- Giving Musheng a Chance: When Zheng Musheng arrives in Thailand as a penniless, undocumented migrant, it is Laishun who gives him shelter at the hostel and a genuine shot at survival.
- Defending Chinese Education: Despite severe local government restrictions on Chinese culture at the time, Laishun quietly uses his hostel space to support secretly teaching the migrant children their native language.
3. A "Knife's Mouth, Tofu's Heart" Humor
Played with incredible local authenticity by actor Fang Peisong, Laishun brings much-needed comic relief to a heavy tearjerker. He frequently bickers with the hostel workers and his daughter, but when Nanzhi tells him to sacrifice his cigarette money so the migrant children can eat, he jokingly fires back that he would "give them his very life".
Ultimately, his character proves that true kindness isn't always polished or soft. His drunken, casual demeanor is a coping mechanism for the harsh immigrant reality, yet underneath it lies a deeply principled man who gives Nanzhi the emotional grit she needs to survive her own tragic future.
Tragic Fire at Hostel
The narrative surrounding the hostel fire and Xie Laishun’s fate represents the exact moment Dear You (给阿嬷的情书) shifts from a lighthearted, bustling comedy into a deeply moving historical tragedy.
The hostel fire is the devastating turning point that forever alters the lives of Xie Laishun, Lan Zhi (Nanzhi), and Zheng Musheng.
The Context: The "Drunken Slacker" Revealed
Before the fire, Laishun is heavily criticized by neighbors for always being drunk and seemingly ignoring the hostel business. However, when the accidental fire breaks out, the audience discovers the true reason for his heavy drinking.
Laishun’s alcoholism was a coping mechanism for the immense, crushing weight of responsibility he carried. He was illegally sheltering undocumented Nanyang migrants, quietly funding underground native-language Chinese education for children, and constantly evading local crackdowns. The pressure of protecting hundreds of vulnerable lives in Bangkok's Chinatown was something he could only numb with alcohol.
The Tragic Fire: A Father’s Ultimate Sacrifice
When the wooden structure of the Chinatown hostel catches fire, it triggers a chain of heartbreaking sacrifices:
- The Rescue: Amidst the roaring flames, Laishun does not run away. He coordinates the chaotic evacuation, pulling trapped migrant families out of the burning rooms.
- The Crucial Loss: While the fire physically destroys the hostel, it also incinerates the historical records, hard-earned money, and irreplaceable Qiaopi (侨批—the vital migrant remittance letters back to China). This severs the physical link between the migrants and their waiting families back home.
The Catalyst for a 20-Year Lie
Laishun’s death and the destruction of the hostel set off the entire emotional core of the film. Following the fire, Zheng Musheng steps up to help rebuild and take care of the community, but he tragically dies later while fighting off thugs to protect others.
Because the fire destroyed everything, and Musheng died a hero, Lan Zhi makes the ultimate choice:
- She honors her father's legacy of absolute selflessness.
- She takes Musheng's place, pretending to be him in letters back to his wife (Ye Shurou) in China for nearly twenty years, sending money out of her own pocket so Shurou would never know her husband died.
The hostel fire burns away Laishun's flawed, drunken exterior and exposes the giant, heroic heart underneath, passing the torch of unconditional love to his daughter.
This drunk man is one of the greatest people in the entire movie. What do you think?
This drunk man is one of the greatest people in the entire movie. What do you think?

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