Skip to main content

Did Zhuge Liang's Succeed because he Married the 'Right' Woman?

Zhuge Liang Prepared for Greatness Before Opportunity Arrived

Most people know the famous story.

Liu Bei visited Zhuge Liang three times at his humble cottage before Zhuge Liang finally agreed to come out of seclusion and help him. The rest is history. With Zhuge Liangs help, Liu Bei turned himself from zero to Emperor of the Shu Han kingdom in 14 years. 

But there is a more interesting question:

Why was Zhuge Liang ready when Liu Bei finally came?

It was not luck.

Long before opportunity knocked on his door, Zhuge Liang had been quietly building the conditions for opportunity.

He Put Himself in the Right Circle

When Zhuge Liang settled in Jingzhou, he was a poor farmer. Although he read a lot, he knows nobody and is far away from the happenings in the world.  As a result, he did not have a chance to work for any of the big guys at that time.   

Zhuge Liang knew that he had to do something.  Either he change or he perish.  

Through an arranged marriage, he associated with some of the region's leading intellectuals and influential families.

One particularly important person was Huang Chengyan, a respected scholar of Jingzhou who became Zhuge Liang's father-in-law.

Huang Chengyan was connected by marriage to the powerful Cai family, which in turn was closely connected to Liu Biao, the ruler of Jingzhou (a province). Cai Mao was an important figure in Liu Biao's establishment.

Zhuge Liang therefore lived remarkably close to the intellectual and political networks of Jingzhou.

There is no historical evidence that Huang Chengyan said, “Marry my daughter and I will give you my contacts and intelligence.”

But the strategic effect of the marriage is difficult to ignore.

Zhuge Liang was no longer merely looking at the political world from outside.

He was connected to people who understood what was happening inside it.

Through scholars, friends and interconnected elite families, he could learn about the political landscape, the competing warlords, their strengths and weaknesses, the position of Liu Biao in Jingzhou, and the growing power of Cao Cao in the north.

He was building something enormously valuable:

situational intelligence.

He Married Intellect, Not Beauty

Huang Chengyan reportedly told Zhuge Liang that his daughter was ugly, she got yellowish hair and dark complexion with a face with flaws, but that her talent was a match for his.

Zhuge Liang accepted.

Later tradition remembers her as Huang Yueying, an unusually intelligent and capable woman that helped Zhuge Liang greatly in the next 30 years. 

Whether every later legend about her is true is less important than the principle contained in the early story:

Zhuge Liang valued capability over appearance.

Think about the environment he was creating around himself.

  • A knowledgeable teacher.
  • An intellectually capable wife.
  • Connections to influential families.
  • Friends and scholars who discussed the affairs of the age.
  • And years of personal study and observation.

Zhuge Liang was effectively building his own strategic intelligence network before he had a position, an army or even an employer.

Then Liu Bei Arrived

This changes the meaning of the famous Three Visits to the Thatched Cottage.

We normally tell the story as:

Liu Bei discovered Zhuge Liang.

Perhaps a better way to see it is:

Zhuge Liang had spent years becoming someone worth discovering.

When Liu Bei finally came looking for him, Zhuge Liang was ready.

He could explain the strategic situation of China and propose what became famous as the Longzhong Plan: a grand strategy built around the competing powers of Cao Cao, Sun Quan, Liu Biao and others.

He did not suddenly become a strategist because Liu Bei gave him a job.

The job came because he had already become the strategist.

That is a very different way of thinking about opportunity.

Create the Opportunity Before It Exists

Many people wait.

  • “I'll prepare when someone offers me the position.”
  • “I'll learn governance when somebody asks me to join a board.”
  • “I'll build my network when I need it.”

Zhuge Liang teaches the opposite.

Prepare first. Position yourself first. Build credibility first. Enter the right circles first.

Then when the opportunity appears, you are already the obvious candidate.

Consider someone who wants to become an Independent Director of a listed company.

There may be no board vacancy today. That does not mean there is nothing to do.

You can acquire the relevant governance qualifications: get Accredited Director and Qualified Listed Entity Director status from Singapore Institute of Directors or elsewhere. Study actual corporate failures. Understand SGX rules and board responsibilities. Develop expertise in finance, strategy and risk. Write and speak about corporate governance. Build genuine relationships with directors, chairmen, professional advisers and business leaders.

Most importantly, don't approach these people thinking:

“Who can give me a board seat?”

Think:

“How can I become someone a Chairman would WANT sitting beside him when a difficult decision has to be made?”

That is Zhuge Liang's lesson.

He didn't wait for Liu Bei before preparing for Liu Bei.

  • He developed knowledge.
  • He built relationships.
  • He entered the right circles.
  • He surrounded himself with intelligent people.
  • And he understood the battlefield before stepping onto it.

So when Liu Bei finally knocked on his door, Zhuge Liang wasn't looking for an opportunity.

He was ready for one.

This is Sun Tzu's 胜兵先胜而后求战:

The victorious first creates the conditions for victory, then enters the battle.

Don't wait for opportunity.

Become ready. Get into the right circle. Create the conditions.

Then one day, opportunity may come knocking on your door.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Secret Under the Mattress: Why would a 79-year Man Bet So Big on 4D?

It was 2007 when we discovered his secret. While moving my father’s mattress, we found them: heaps and heaps of Singapore Pools 4D tickets. They were stacked in layers, a paper trail of lost hopes. What shocked us most wasn’t just the volume, but the stakes. He wasn’t betting a few dollars for fun. He was punting hundreds of dollars per draw—nearly ten times a month. At the time, my siblings and I were furious. Our father was a 79-year-old retiree. We wondered, with a mix of anger and confusion, why a man at his stage of life would need to win such "big money." What was he going to do with the money? We saw it as a reckless habit, a sign of poor judgment in his final years.  Some of us would say, "If I were to give him money to buy 4D, why don't I use the money and buy 4D myself?  At least I have better discipline".  It has taken me two decades, and the experience of raising my own three grown-up children, to finally see the truth that was hidden under that matt...

Have You Found Your Sun Yi and Teresa Teng?

I n the long, unfolding history of the Chinese-language music scene, "The Moon Represents My Heart" 月亮代表我的心 stands as an unsurpassable milestone. Yet, the journey of this globally renowned masterpiece, a song that would eventually captivate the world, was fraught with setbacks: it was once dismissed as "trash" by its own creator and tossed into a wastebasket, later suppressed by official policy as a "banned song ," and initially failed to gain any traction when performed by two different singers. The dramatic turnaround in this song’s fate is not merely a musical legend; it offers a profound life lesson: the greatest stroke of luck in life is not about how perfect you are, but about encountering the "right people", those who truly understand you, support you, and help you realize your potential, at exactly the right moment. I. The First "Right Person": A "Talent Scout" Who Recognizes Your Worth In the early 1970s, composer T...

How to Use Zoom Cloud Meetings Effectively

(Read also How to Secure Your Zoom meeting ) Other than Zoom Cloud Meeting, you can use other video conferencing platforms like Google Hangouts, Skype and WeChat Video Conference.  Zoom is the most popular because it is free and is easy to use, especially on the phone .  Here's how you can use Zoom effectively: Use a laptop, not your phone or tablet, especially when you are hosting a meeting.  On a laptop, you can see everything: the PowerPoint screen that you are sharing, video of all participants and the group chats.  You can easily type on a laptop and this is useful when you are translating or doing detailed explanations.   The host of the zoom meeting should mute everyone at the settings and only unmute them when they speak.  Participants can indicate that they want to speak by raising their hands before speaking Use earpiece or headsets or wireless earbuds so that you have a better concentration of the voices in the meeting and not be d...